You know how there's this unspoken rule that, when you go out with a guy, he has to wait until three days after the date to call you back? Well, do you think realtors have a similar rule? The reason that I'm asking is that I still haven't heard the first thing about Saturday's showing from my realtor. I don't know if that means that Mr. I'm Sorry I'm Late hasn't called her or he has but she can't be bothered to call me. All I know that it's got my overactive imagination working overtime.For instance, I'm picturing the guy's clients going home Saturday night, completely elated that they found The One. Then Sunday afternoon, they decide to go for a drive and see The One in daylight. They turn into the subdivision and hear a series of high-pitch, inaudible screams. They look at each other and shrug. They just assume that someone is watching a horror movie on cable with the windows open. They drive a little further, but the screams continue. One of them even says, "Man, that TV is loud." Then they turn onto my street. A gang of unruly preteen girls runs out in front of the car, causing the driver to slam on her brakes. The girls simultaneously put their hands on their hips, as one of the girls looks at the driver, yells, "Bitch, I know you didn't!," and throws a stick at the windshield. For the next ten minutes, the girls meander in the street with their popsicles in one hand and their pit bull's leash in the other, allowing the driver to only advance a foot at a time. Finally, the driver has had enough of the girls' antics. Realizing the true reason The One is on the market--the neighborhood itself is a horror movie--the driver puts her car in reverse and gets the hell out of Dodge.
You would think that I'm being overly dramatic in that scenario, but I'm not. That's how the kids in my neighborhood behave. Just see my post about the dog feces in my mailbox. That's why I'm scared that, three-day rule or not, I'll never get the call that begins, "They put an offer the house."
